When first being introduced to DnD you will find a variety of classes that are presented before you and at first what draws attention to you might be something that suits your sexual orientation, masculine or feminine if you will.
Most women might be more drawn to being a druid or a sorcerer because of the more “feminine” tendencies of the class such as using will over strength, or being able to connect with nature through your “nurturing” sense” of things. while this may be mostly true, this isn’t always the case and not always the back story.
While many men may be more drawn to being a fighter, paladin or ranger because of the weapon skills, strength specs or defense proficiencies just because that is what they may be more familiar with, (not that this is always the case, of course in general is what I refer too) still, not all men perceive things this way.
As players in a game that is full of different options we almost always will be drawn to what makes us more comfortable because we can relate more with the character we are trying to play. But what is it that really makes us uncomfortable?
Is it for a women the idea of being “strong” that might give someone an interpretation of us that is not really how we see ourselves based on societal standards, or the fear that being a half orc fighter means that we are “masculine” and not understood to some sense as a women that we strive to be as both feminine and enduringly tough?
That we are less “feminine” for being both strong and a badass? Or is it that a man might feel that playing a spell caster marks him as weak or not able to protect and defend as a “man” should In the ideal that society has placed on him, such as pretty much being an unstoppable robot of endless strength and genuine “manliness” that just comes with having a cock. (Hollywood).
While the public has de-evolved society by displaying these incredibly dull and false notions of what masculine and feminine means, it has also stunted the growth and character of many amazing and creative class builds that come to life when these flaws and absolutes of dualism between sexes are squashed.
Take Aragorn from the book series The Lord Of The Rings for example, while in the movie they didn’t portray his incredible skills in many of the arts that he was proficient in (I highly recommend reading The Silmarillion and The Lord Of The Rings books, especially if you call yourself a nerd), he was seen mostly as a fighter/adventurer who gets the girl and helps saves the world.
In reality the story is more detailed than that, he was a man of Westerness who could not have been a king without being a warrior as well as a healer. He was both warrior and healer and that was what made him a king to his people. As a sorcerer, druid, wizard, cleric or bard, a lot of this classes ability comes from non- strength actions, ie, using will and magic over strength and raw force to conquer.
At first a player might look at these characters as intimidating or unfamiliar because of there spell casting rituals or book learned spells and see this as a more “feminine” way of playing; too “witchy” or “feminine” of rolls to play as a “man”.
As a “man” you should have some kind of sword or gun right? Wrong! The staff is a symbol in and of itself. It’s an old symbol most cultures around the world have as a king/healer who is wise and confident in his wisdom; a person deserving respect and honor from his past actions. Yet still, somehow, he has been spoken to be a crazy old fool with a stick, a crow bringing bad news, or even a sex offender looking to trick women into infidelity, all rolls that leave the wise old male witch/sorcerer/spell castor to be an evil character, or some kind of screw up meant for hiding in the shadows.
While these ideals have been placed on these male character types it couldn’t be more far from the truth. As a spell casting character you are not only in sync with the “psychic” or esoteric side of things it makes you far from being a “wimp” or “softy”if anything it makes you a scary yet powerful badass, one that is not to be messed with! Your power comes from your understanding of the duality of life!
The male and female sorcerers are incredibly well rounded in skill and strength, without the weapon of force to prove it! So give the spell casters a shot! Play one and see how much fun they can be! Personally for me, playing a Bard, has been one of my favorite characters so far because of how much I get to imagine and design! I challenge you to get creative with what you bring to the table as both a man and women! Don’t be shy! Be weird and authentic with what comes into your mind!
As always, have fun and stay nerdy!